Home

Its weird when you realize that you have a home away from home.  Being my first adventure away from the nest, you wonder if you could ever recreate home.  The truth is, you can't.  There is nothing like it and you can create a chunk of it but there truly is no place like home.  There's the familiarity of knowing every stop light and seeing faces from your past that makes you feel comfort, the comfort of knowing and predictability. 

I stumbled into our place, hands full of grocery bags and cut flowers.  I ran into the garbage waiting for my return at the door.  I dropped everything, sat in the doorway and thought "I'm home or a chunk of a home we have created."  I finally feel like I have my spot in this massive place called Manhattan and it hasn't eaten me alive, its been very kind to me.  Its been over 2 months and meeting people hasn't been hard, figuring out this city came with time and my relationship keeps getting better. 

Although my new home finally fell into place, my heart continues to call for familiarity mostly when the apartment is empty and my beloved faces are simple fond slide shows in my brain.  With all of them having a very special relationship with me, some have changed others continue to thrive.  Some didn't understand playing off their own insecurities that may have surfaced within this change.  Others knew I was suffocating in Minnesota, not that I didn't love it there but I needed a new environment so that I can create.  I wish those relationships knew how easy it was to get back to square one with me.  I just want everyone to be happy and supportive as I would do the same for them (you know who you are). 

Don't you ever feel uninspired?  and that sometimes with change brings inspired thought, brings room for more thought?  Takes you from the same routine and thrusts you into something unknown, where a way is for you to create.  This is what I love and what made me jump into this decision.  

For right now I have found my home away from home and I can say for right now, I am okay.  Better then okay, better then I have been awhile.  My home will always be there and trust me there is nothing better although I have found the next best thing.